Thoughts…

Today was a very a long day but I spent the majority of the day with the best woman on this planet…my mom!

She picked me up from the airport, dressed to impress! We both were screaming and talking over each other like long lost best friends (2 Gemini’s what do you expect?)

You would think that coming straight from the airport we would go home, right? Wrong. After shopping and talking, we headed home and ate, ate, ATE!

Catching up on my life in D.C., my mom decided to ask me certain questions that I wasn’t sure if I wanted to discuss. Wondering if I was excited to see certain people and nervous to see others, I tried my best to be as honest and forthcoming with my answers as I could; but knowing my mother, she knew I was lying.

After a lengthy discussion on lessons she has learned in love,  and several scriptures  used as talking points, my mother  imparted some much needed wisdom and guidance when it came to the direction of my non-exsistent but ever so thriving love life.

Just reminiscing on everything that has happened to me this year, this was all I could muster up.

I can name several amazing, more than qualified, deserving, easy to love men that God has  consistently placed in my life as unwavering friends with open hearts. In actuality, I was not truly ready to step up and accept everything I shouted into the heavens that I wanted for so long. Like most people, I feared walking away from old habits, old familiar places and was heavily concerned with trying to please everyone except myself. How foolish of me to think that I could ever please EVERYONE. How disgraceful of me to cheat myself and others by giving pieces of me rather than wholeheartedly pouring myself into a two party relationship which would make my attempt at taking over the world that much easier. I feel quite shameful for using my own intellect and emotion when it came to matters of the heart when You (God) already promised me that an ordained union on Your accord will transcend any relationship I could ever fathom. 

Not much to say…just lost in my thoughts…

 

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