What Lane Are You In?

I remember years ago someone told me I should take caution when it comes to love, I did…I did.- Shontelle ‘Impossible’

It’s that time again when we have to revisit our dating/relationship “statuses”. Ugh….

Some of us are in the dark, tip-toeing around feelings or just down right ignorant when it comes to  the person that we are dealing with. Whose fault is it? Well, I can’t speak for every situation but i think that is void of the point. This is not the time to be unaware or filled with assumptions. Knowledge is key.

 Trust me, assumptions lead you NOWHERE, unless you like going down  long, confusing, windy roads.

A good friend of mine sent me this video and it had me thinking: Do we women know where we stand with the men in our lives? 

OCTV Hump Day- Zeus 

via Olive Cocoa Mag

Yes, the video made me chuckle but it made me re-evaluate my situation and it should make you do the same. How many women are placed in categories that they weren’t aware of. Most are dating men and hoping that it leads to a relationship. Nothing wrong with that but just make sure you guys are on the same level. Communication is key and many of us aren’t doing that. Sleeping your way into a relationship doesn’t work, actually that is counter productive. Acting like ‘wifey’ doesn’t solidify that title, trust me  been there, done that.

However, what happens to those who ask and do all the right things yet, the man gives them the run around. What happens next?

My advice would be to stop all the perks that were there before should no longer exist. Yes, you can still hang out but feelings and sex should cease. Why give this person the best of you when they can’t give you a straight answer on the direction of your courtship? There is one thing to not know but if you have been dating this period for an extended amount of time and you don’t know what is happening, yea, you need to step back and re-evaluate.

Our society is all about sex and sexual gratification. What is the point of being in a committed, monogamous relationship when everyone is just trying to sleep around and play. Yea, it can seem enticing but why be with someone who wants the frill of a relationship but doesn’t want the responsibility or accountability? It might bring the demise of that relationship but why be with someone who doesn’t truly want to be with you.

It is one thing to be unsure but there is another thing to drag it out, the only one who benefits at the end is usually the guy.

If you are secure with the person you are dating than  kudos to you, but for the ones out there in the gray area, do yourself a favor and just ASK. If he doesn’t give you an answer or seems like he is dodging than take that non-answer as the answer. If a guy wants to be with you, he won’t hesitate to make his intentions clear.

 

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